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Matchmaking for Millennials: Are Dating Apps Dead?
Millennials are known for being tech-savvy and used to having services – and people – available...
read moreDating is evolving, and 25 years after Match.com launched in the UK in 1998, there’s a notable shift as singles explore alternative ways to find love, including a return to face-to-face meet ups instead of scrolling through online or dating app profiles. Dating fatigue has become the buzzword, as many people have become tired and worn out by this online methodology of trying to find love. With around 1.4 million defecting away from online apps in the last year alone, more people are now viewing dating as a chore rather than being an enjoyable social activity—that is a hefty amount of casualties for many of the big names of dating.
Interestingly it was Tinder—owned by Match.com—who suffered the biggest losses, which are said by the Guardian to be more than 500,000 users, with Bumble and Hinge also taking a severe hit, losing 368,000 and 131,000 respectively in the same period. That’s a serious number of daters saying ‘thanks, but no thanks’ and turning their attention to finding new and more traditional ways of dating, such as personal matchmaking and being introduced face to face.
So, meeting online isn’t the only solution, and in recent times after being highlighted by popular dating shows on TV on numerous occasions, personal matchmaking has surged back. An increasing number of people are beginning to see that old-fashioned guidance from an expert can be worth its weight in gold, and that meeting in person can be considered a winning formula in terms of finding someone special.
Why Are Online Dating Site and App User Numbers Declining?
The University of Leeds Centre for Love, Sex and Relationships believes that the decline in numbers comes from a sense of detachment from reality and also fatigue with the process, describing it as a chore rather than an enjoyable social activity. The establishment continues to explain that detachment from reality can be a reason for some behaving quite badly behind their keyboards, and that they are aware they can get away with what Natasha McKeever (Co-Director of the Leeds CLSR) describes as ‘shitty behaviour’ as they do not have to face the consequences for it.
McKeever continues in her interview with The Guardian: “It becomes tedious, and just feels like you’re doing admin, like you’re not connecting with anyone and you’re just trying to get through people,” she says. “You see it less like talking to real, individual people and you start seeing it like they’re all just cards in a deck.”
McKeever says that this feeling of disconnection means people have become more comfortable with sending abusive messages because they don’t fear the repercussions they would face in person.
“I think a lot of people see it like a game, they interact in ways that they would never interact with people in real life, because they’re behind a screen they don’t have to deal with the consequence of shitty behaviour”.
That is a remarkably interesting synopsis, and we made contact with Andrew Parker Dennis, Managing Director at Dating Options Ltd, the UK’s largest personal matchmaking group to see if his point of view was similar to that of Natasha McKeever, and it was.
Says Parker Dennis: “We enjoyed a record year last year, just at the time when online traffic for dating sites and apps was declining. I fully endorse the words of Natasha McKeever that it has become tedious and a chore for many. Swiping left or right on an app and not really going beyond that is inane and offers no real depth whatsoever—how are you ever going to base a real and ongoing relationship on something so superficial?”
He continues: “It is interesting that the Leeds CLSR have picked up on behavioural issues, and I do wholeheartedly agree with that being one of the root causes of the decline in numbers for online sites and apps. The way they treat others can be shocking and a far cry from how they would interact with someone face to face, either on a one-to-one basis or in a group, and it is downright unacceptable. But also, it is not the only reason.”
He highlights the other significantly difficult problem for online daters: “For me, the other big issue is that of safety and it has been an ongoing problem for online companies and apps right from the start, that has never been truly tackled. It looks to me like many of the big players have ignored it and hoped it would go away—it has not, and it will not. What I am highlighting is safety. For years, the online dating crime rate has risen unabated, and it is not just one type of crime either—it is fraud and scamming, with fraudulent identities surging in the UK every day. In turn, there has been more than £300,000,000 misappropriated in the UK over the last four years, if we include dating and social media sites together. But, it’s also what I’d describe as the ‘nasty crimes’, with rape, sexual assault, violence against the person, and blackmail all running at levels no one would ever believe before the internet was launched, which for me is incredibly sad.”
Safer Alternatives We Recommend Over Online Dating
So, what do we actually recommend? Well, if it is true that there is a definite trend to move towards meeting face to face, then both personal matchmaking and dating events ought to feature right at the forefront of new and different ways to meet a potential partner. Here are our top picks:
Personal Matchmaking
Many people looking for an alternative to meeting online or via smartphone apps are younger and in their 20s, 30s and 40s, so we definitely thought we should be catering for singles under 49, and that lends itself to recommending our own specialist company, Matchmakers Dating. Alternatively, for more mature adults, Avenues Dating targets the 50+ market.
We are happy to say that Matchmakers was founded way back in 2006, and so we have stood the test of time. We are also priced relatively sensibly as opposed to many London-based agencies. We highly recommend our own dating membership services as a starting point for your research into credible alternatives by visiting the Matchmakers site and starting a conversation about how we could best help you.
Avenues Dating specialises in the older age group of 50+. Avenues has been around in the UK since the early 1990s, so more than 3 decades. The company has also more than stood the test of time and is as strong today and as much in demand as it's ever been. Again, it is concentrating on a niche market, this time of older daters - the ‘silver surfers’ of the internet in the UK - many of whom may well remember Avenues as a household name, before internet dating arrived in the UK in 1997.
Dating Events
The other avenue for meeting people organically or face-to-face is dating events. In 2024, these events experienced a resurgence, reversing the declining trend in favour of dating apps and online platforms. Our top recommendation is RSVP Dating, a company that specialises in organising a variety of singles events, as well as offering professional matchmaking services.
Events have many advantages over other forms of dating, and one of the biggest is cost which is often terrific value. RSVP offers black tie balls, dinner parties, drinks evenings, craft evenings, weekends away, theatre trips, go-karting, walks—you name it, they have done it or will have it planned.
RSVP also offers lifetime events memberships, so as long as you continue to pay your monthly subscription, then your membership and its benefits continue. We believe this is one of the best value options in the whole of dating, and you are in control as you can cancel your standing order at any time. You might find yourself looking at a great solution to the tedium and boredom people are suffering online and on smartphone apps. This just might put the enjoyment back into dating permanently.
If you’d like to know more about how Matchmakers Dating can help you to find your special someone, then reach out to our dating experts today. Our membership advisers are available from 9am until 9pm, both on weekdays, weekends, and some bank holidays. Call us on 0800 644 4130 or fill out our simple contact form — we’d be delighted to talk you through your options and how matchmaking can benefit you. One promise that we will always make – whichever option you choose to take – is that it will never be tedious or boring. We look forward to hearing from you.
