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Is Speed Dating a good or bad way of meeting a serious partner? Well when you’re new to dating and have perhaps come out of a long term relationship or marriage, we know it can be very daunting indeed and very probably confusing too in terms of what methodology is available to help you in your search for a new partner. Speed Dating is one of a plethora of options available to you.
Confusing Isn't It?
There are so many different options and niches within the dating industry and when you’re just beginning the search to try to find a new partner it can seem a total maze in terms of moving forward and understandably not everybody is aware of the choices available. So in a series of short articles we are trying to put more people in an informed position, to try to ensure they are more aware and more comfortable with the options they have to move forward and hopefully find love again and that they can at least begin to evaluate what might be the best way forward for them as individuals.
Speed Dating As An Option
Today we are going to have a look at the concept of Speed Dating and give you the facts about how it works and whether it could be for you in your search. We compare Speed Dating to the use of Online Dating or using a Dating App on your smart phone and also how they both compare to using traditional face to face dating, through the use of a Personal Matchmaker. We will start with some history and how the concept began in both the USA and the UK.
Speed Dating - The Background
Speed Dating began taking the UK by storm in early 2003, having been invented initially years earlier by Jewish Rabbi Yaacov Deyo in Los Angeles, California, when he became concerned that not enough young members of the Jewish Church were meeting, falling in love and marrying. Although in 1996 Aryeh and Rena Hirsch had actually run a similar type of event, also in L.A. and could also have a claim to be first. Also Aish HaTora registered the trademark as a single word in 1998.
Matchmakers Dating Heritage
In the UK, companies such as Speed Dater, When the Music Stops, Slow Dating, Original Dating and later Ditch or Date, were the pioneers and Matchmakers Dating can lay claim to be the ‘offspring’ of When the Music Stops or the ‘Daughter of Speed Dating’ when we we launched initially as part of that company in 2006, when it was realised that events weren’t to the taste of everybody and that many people preferred a less public and more discreet approach to dating, 16 years later we are still going strong as one of the UK’s leading and most popular Personal Matchmaking company’s – specialising in younger age groups between 25 and 49.
How It Works
The attraction of Speed Dating was just that – speed and seeing multiple ‘mini dates’ in one evening. Often you saw maybe up to 20 dates in one night – the actual record for When the Music Stops was 58 men and women gathered at Via Fossa in Nottingham in 2005 and the advantages that Speed Dating had over Online Dating or Dating Apps was a massive one, which was sitting with each of your ‘mini dates’ for around 5 minutes to chat briefly and to get to know them a little but giving you that unique opportunity to check out that vital chemistry face to face, before deciding if you’d like to build on that initial meeting by exchanging phone numbers or email addresses and continuing to get to know each other with a view to meeting again.
Checking Out That Vital Chemistry
The way it usually works is that ladies are allocated a numbered table in a private room or sectioned of part of a larger public room in a pub or bar and the men then move round and conduct each mini date by spending 5 minutes with each lady, chatting and generally getting to know each other or utilising the set of suggested questions for those who may well not have attended before – just designed to keep the conversation flowing and to avoid any awkward silences.
Deciding And Feedback
Happily 5 minutes does seem to pass extraordinarily quickly and often it seems like you have only just sat down when it’s actually time to move on again, particularly if there is a spark and the two of you have enjoyed your time together and your chat. At the end of each of your mini dates the usual format was to tick your match card as to whether or not you’d liked your opposite number and whether or not you’d like to see them again. These days of course many companies would have much more advanced technology than simply box ticking but I’m sure you get the idea. Usually your matches are available within 24 hours of each event and there always seemed to be a buzz of excitement and anticipation when your matches were due, especially if you’d really liked somebody!
A Very Good Concept
Many people got a real enjoyment from Speed Dating and appreciated their evening enough to come back again, some of them many times and we frequently saw Speed Dating ‘addicts’ coming back time after time – on occasions to almost every event locally. There were downsides too however, as not everybody wants or is prepared to be quite so public in the way they meet potential partners, and sitting in a sometimes busy bar or pub, chatting to others was certainly taboo for many and there was therefore often a stigma to attending speed dating, even though as a concept it worked very well.
Great Value Too!
It was also often great value for money at typically £20 for the evening and the chance to meet typically between 12 and 20 potential partners. Many people also found out a fun night out and came along with friends, work colleagues and social / sporting groups just to enjoy the atmosphere and have a great time. So £20 for an evening of entertainment that often started with the check in at 7.30pm and regularly was still going after 11pm was a real bargain in many people’s eyes, especially on occasions when a complimentary drink was provided to ensure that nerves were easily overcome – and usually they really were, with everybody smiling and chatting away as soon as the evening had begun.
Typical Attendees
At When the Music Stops, we often had many regular attenders, Men can sometimes be a rarer commodity in dating and are often well out numbered by ladies attending. With Speed Dating however, once they had tried it, they often came back time and time again, as they became comfortable with the concept and realised that they could be successful at it, probably more so than other forms of organised dating. It worked for them, they enjoyed getting matches and meeting people in that way. However ‘Men are from Mars and women are from Venus’ and it was ‘different for girls’. They usually attended in pairs or small groups and perhaps used the Speed Dating concept as it was originally intended, which was meeting someone and going into a relationship with them over the longer term, so it was often a fair while until we saw them return. But on many occasions they did.
Derivatives Of Speed Dating
Eventually events diversified and offered more, also different types of event sprang up, you name it – we ran it.
Here are a few examples:
- Cocktail Making Dating - having fun together making cocktails.
- Astro Dating - looking for a potential partner with the right astrological sign for you.
- Mix and Mingle Events
- Dinner Dating Events - similar to Speed Dating but over a 3/4 or 5 course meal, with the men moving on after each course to spend a short while with each lady around the table.
- Blind Dating Events - with each person wearing a blindfold, so as not to be heavily influenced by the physical appearance of their opposite numbers.
- Singles Parties - a great night out, where everybody is ‘guaranteed’ to be single, dancing to your favourite sounds, courtesy of a DJ.
Personal Matchmaking
Is it confidential?
Yes
Is it visible to the public?
No
Payment type
One Time
Can I check the chemistry instantly?
No
Are potential dates carefully checked out?
Yes
Are my dates guaranteed to be genuine?
Yes
Is face to face advice readily available?
Yes
Access to a dating coach
Yes
Can I visit the dating companies office?
Yes
Is it supervised?
Yes
Is there varying joining options?
Yes
Am I interviewed?
Yes
Can I suspend my membership if I meet someone?
Yes
Do I get a number of guaranteed matches?
Yes
Is there a headhunting service?
Yes
Speed Dating
Is it confidential?
No
Is it visible to the public?
Yes
Payment type
One Time
Can I check the chemistry instantly?
No
Are potential dates carefully checked out?
No
Are my dates guaranteed to be genuine?
No
Is face to face advice readily available?
No
Access to a dating coach
No
Can I visit the dating companies office?
No
Is it supervised?
Yes
Is there varying joining options?
Yes
Am I interviewed?
Yes
Can I suspend my membership if I meet someone?
No
Do I get a number of guaranteed matches?
No
Is there a headhunting service?
No
Online Dating Site Or Dating App
Is it confidential?
No
Is it visible to the public?
Yes
Payment type
Membership
Can I check the chemistry instantly?
Yes
Are potential dates carefully checked out?
No
Are my dates guaranteed to be genuine?
No
Is face to face advice readily available?
No
Access to a dating coach
No
Can I visit the dating companies office?
No
Is it supervised?
No
Is there varying joining options?
No
Am I interviewed?
No
Can I suspend my membership if I meet someone?
No
Do I get a number of guaranteed matches?
No
Is there a headhunting service?
No
In Comparison To Personal Matchmaking
So that is Speed Dating and how it compares, it is now for you to decide whether or not it’s for you. These days the team here at Matchmakers Dating is 100% committed to high quality Personal Matchmaking and offering a comprehensive and very personal service to our target market – younger singles ages 25-49. Since 2006 we have grown our database to over 10,000 people, all of which have been personally interviewed before they are allowed to join and are then carefully vetted to ensure they are 100% who they say they are, are free from any involvement in crime and also that they are solvent and are joining for the right reasons. Which is a level of detail that simply couldn’t be delivered with other forms of dating, like Speed Dating and Online Dating or Dating Apps, as a) the costs would be too great and b) they simply wouldn’t have the resources to commit to that sort of level of detail.
The Costs Involved
But we know personal matchmaking memberships are not for everyone and are not within everyone’s budget, so if you decide that it isn’t for you, we still do run popular and fun dating events through our sister companies www.RSVP-int.co.uk and in London www.electclub.co.uk - if you’d like to meet other singles and check out that chemistry right up front you can still do that. If Personal matchmaking is your preference but you are 50+ then www.avenuesdating.co.uk would be able to help and offer you a membership. But I hope our article on comparing your options and looking closely at what is included has been helpful?
Getting In Touch With Matchmakers Dating
Could we help you more? Our team of Membership Advisers are available from 9am until 9pm almost every day and would be happy to talk to you and answer your questions on dating generically and can be reached on 0800 644 4130 or alternatively complete our contact form below and we’d be happy to phone you or arrange a face to face meeting at our centrally located office, south of Birmingham.
The Choice Is Yours
The choice is yours and they could vary from a fun night out for little money, to an online membership, swiping left or right on a dating app or a fully fledged, long term Personal Matchmaking membership and the chance to work with one of our professional Personal Matchmakers for between 9 and 18 months, gaining access to some of the most attractive and eligible singles in the UK, whose background we can 100% guarantee. Whatever your choice is we are happy to help without any sort of obligation or compulsion to join, so please do make that call it 0800 644 4130.
